Absence of Trust: Why Vulnerability Is the Job Seeker’s Secret Weapon
📖 Book Reference: The Five Dysfunctions of a Team by Patrick Lencioni
Why Trust Matters in a Job Search
Patrick Lencioni opens The Five Dysfunctions of a Team by describing trust as the foundation of all teamwork. Without it, everything else breaks down. In his words:
“Remember, teamwork begins by building trust. And the only way to do that is to overcome our need for invulnerability.”
For teams, trust means being able to admit mistakes, share weaknesses, and ask for help without fear of judgment. For job seekers, it means the very same thing.
When you’re navigating a career transition, trying to appear flawless can actually slow you down. Vulnerability — being real about your goals, your needs, and even your struggles — is what unlocks momentum in a job search.
What Absence of Trust Looks Like in a Job Search
In the book, Lencioni describes a team where members withhold their ideas and hide mistakes. The result is wasted time, politics, and poor decisions. For job seekers, the absence of trust often shows up in subtle ways, such as:
Going it alone. You avoid telling people you’re searching because you don’t want to “bother” them.
Wearing a mask. You put on a polished front in interviews but never let your authentic self shine through.
Staying silent. You keep questions to yourself rather than asking recruiters, mentors, or hiring managers for clarity.
Self-doubt. You don’t fully trust your own skills and therefore hesitate to apply for roles that stretch you.
Just like a dysfunctional team wastes time and energy, a job search without trust can become isolating, exhausting, and ineffective.
Flipping the Script: Building Trust as a Job Seeker
The opposite of dysfunction is creating an environment of openness — both with yourself and with others. Lencioni notes:
“Trust is knowing that when a team member does push you, they’re doing it because they care about the team.”
As a job seeker, that means:
Be honest about your needs. Instead of saying, “I’ll figure it out,” try: “I’m targeting marketing manager roles in tech — do you know anyone I should meet?”
Share your authentic story. Don’t hide career breaks, transitions, or challenges — frame them as growth moments. Employers and networks respond to real stories.
Lean on your network. Most people genuinely want to help but can’t if they don’t know what you’re aiming for. Trust them enough to ask.
Trust yourself. Just as teams need confidence in their members, you need confidence in your own skills and experiences. Remember: you bring value.
Practical Ways to Build Trust in Your Job Search
Tell three people about your job search this week. Share your goals and ask for one specific type of support (feedback, introductions, advice).
Practice vulnerability in interviews. Instead of giving a “perfect” answer, share a real example of a challenge you faced and how you overcame it.
Reframe “help” as collaboration. You’re not asking for charity — you’re inviting people into your journey.
Start with small asks. Trust grows over time. Begin by asking for a quick review of your LinkedIn profile before requesting referrals.
Worksheet / Exercise Option: “My Trust Network Map”
Step 1: List 10 people you could reach out to (friends, colleagues, mentors, managers, LinkedIn connections).
Step 2: Circle 3 names of people you feel most comfortable being open with.
Step 3: Write one specific ask for each (e.g., “Could you review my resume?” / “Do you know anyone hiring in X industry?”).
Step 4: Commit to reaching out to those three people this week.
👉 By mapping your trust network, you’ll see that you already have support available — you just need to activate it.
Reflection
Lencioni reminds us that trust is not built overnight; it’s built through small moments of vulnerability over time. The same is true in your career search. Every time you ask for help, share your story authentically, or take the leap to apply for a role that stretches you, you strengthen that foundation of trust.
Takeaway
Job searches thrive on trust — in yourself, in your network, and in the process. By embracing vulnerability, you’ll not only accelerate your path to interviews and offers but also build stronger connections that last beyond your current transition.
Stay tuned for Article 3: Fear of Conflict — Why Honest Conversations Make You Stronger.
